plane ticket? check.

So, it's been awhile. I last left you, faithful blogmates, with floundering dreams and wonderings of a return back to the Middle Kingdom. It has since been about 4 months, and my vague desires have turned into something more concrete. After much deliberating with dear friends and family, weighing pros and cons, pondering my life's direction and then finally deciding "to hell with it all, I'm only young and single once", I have decided concretely to move to China next year to study Chinese. I've resigned from my job, have moved from my beautiful and beloved apartment and roommates, packed up most of my things, and am sitting in the transition period from life in Minnesota to life in Beijing. I'm leaving those things in which I love, things that are good (and comfortable), and am now standing on the edge of the vast unknown, peering into an mysterious future full of adventure and curiosity. I've enrolled in my Chinese classes, my visa is on the way, and the plane ticket is bought. This is really happening.

To maintain consistency, I'll continue to use this platform to keep you updated on Katie's Asian Adventures, Round 2. Keep checking in for further thoughts, happenings, and general observations about life abroad.

Kate in Beijing? Or...Kate dreaming of Beijing?

I could start this entry, my foray back into the blogging world, with the ever-popular "I've been so terrible at blogging, my apologies..." or even the "I'm so busy, I moved back from China and then life happened...", but I'll spare you the typical-bloggers excuses, because neither of those represent my true reasons for not blogging. As you may or may not have noticed, this is a blog about my Asian adventures, and since I'm no longer in Asia, I sort of feel like a poser writing blog entries about my non-existent Asian adventures.

However, there are reasons for picking up my Asian blog. I'm actually doing this off of the assumption that no one reads this blog any longer, but just in case you do (or I direct you to start reading again), I'm using this medium to keep you, my beloved dear ones, informed of my hopeful adventures back to Asia. Probably more than anything at this point, this blog serves as a medium to process my thoughts, and be held accountable to some of those thoughts with you as my witness (otherwise, if they were just thoughts...they'd be in my journal).

As you may (or may not) know, this journey towards Asia has been in my sights for quite some time. Since the first time I visited that magical place back in 2005, the crazy country has pulled on my heart strings and beckoned me to return with a persistence like nothing else I've ever pursued. I'm sure that many of you think I'm crazy (let's be honest, most of the time I feel a little crazy). There really is no logic behind it's magical lure; it's a dirty country, full of chaos and mayhem, they speak a ridiculously hard language, they don't use clothes dryers, and dairy products are really hard to find (maybe I should start channeling my inner vegan...). Anyway, long story short, China life is not easy, nor is it glamorous. If you have read my blog at any length, you will realize that it is full of many shaky-fist moments, confusion and frustration. BUT, on the other hand, it is fascinating. A country full of promise, waiting for their international "coming out", and willing and eager to take the risks needed to make their economy grow. The people are charming, genuine and more generous than you would anticipate (if they're not trying to con you out of something) Stuff is happening there, and while in the West we are all waiting with bated-breath to see their next move, the country is moving at a rapid pace in their frantic efforts to keep moving forward.

So, I guess that probably offers no more clarity or insight to my persistent draw towards Asia, but...that's all I have to offer you. Its a persistent dream that won't let me go. So, as I move forward and make steps toward returning to Asia, learning the language, and looking for ways to put my skills and passion for the people into use, I wanted to keep you updated on my progress. China is far away, and the only way I can be successful at any sort of venture into the unknown is with the support, thoughts and feedback of "my people" (meaning you). As John Donne wisely once told us, "No man is an island". I need the thoughts, support and wisdom that only you have to offer.

I also want to mention that although this vague movement in the China direction hasn't taken on much concrete form, there are some general thoughts about what next steps may look like. I would really love to talk to you about my different "wonderings", and get guidance and support on the best ways to proceed forward.

As I move forward, I'll keep ya'll updated on progress.

Phew. That was longer than I intended it to be.

Also, I guess since this blog outlines my Asian Adventures, I should mention that I DID get a quick trip to Asia over Thanksgiving. I was able to spend a week in China, with my time split between Beijing and Dalian. My fellow China-mates: if you haven't been to Dalian, you should go. It is just a quick plane ride (probably a really long train ride) from Beijing, but it is beautiful! If you haven't already, check out my facebook pictures. I'm pretty sure it would be much more enjoyable if you weren't fighting the cold and wind (so, maybe go in the spring or summer), but it is definitely a wonderful break from the smogginess of Beijing.
Overall, the trip was an excellent time to reconnect with great people (aka saying goodbye to Carmen before she returned home!), and also to re-affirm the draw that I have to being there. I'll leave it at that...you probably have already looked at pictures, so you know the gist.

Hope all is well friends, and I will give you more information as it comes.

the last typical Saturday

As this week marks many of my "Beijing lasts", today exemplified the last of what I would like to call a "typical Saturday".

As with all of my Saturdays for the last four months, this one started early. I met Carmen at the train station at 7:50 (we had planned for 7:30, but again as in all usual Saturdays, we always run late). We hopped on the ditie, and rode line 13 to the Xizhimen stop, got off, and walked really quickly to the bus stop (in order not to miss the bus like we usually do). After grabbing a breakfast jiaotzi (sp?!), we hopped on the 632 and rode to the Kindergarten at Shuguong Huayuan.

Today was our last day of class. I was really prepared to be sad, to get all mushy with the kids and say goodbye and how much I was going to miss them... well, that didn't happen. It's probably a good thing. The performance that we had prepared for parents and other family members turned out to be mass chaos, with kids walking around everywhere, not sitting where they were supposed to, everything going for shorter than we anticipated (thus ending about 30 minutes early), and other students coming late and missing their performance. I guess it was a typical Chinese get-together. After two hours of running around, herding stray children and leading them in song and dance, I was ready to say goodbye. And although I will miss them and their cute little Chinese English... I truly hope this was my last foray into teaching children. Yes, even teaching my own children. For as cute as they are, there is something a little annoying about trying to tell a group of 20 kids to sit down and listen when they really don't understand a word you're saying.

the little rascals

Phew, I'm tired even writing about that morning. SO, after the end of the semester performance for my class, Carmen and I had our last "after-teaching" ritual (so it seems my life is a little "ritualistic"... I can neither confirm nor deny that). Often after an exhausting day of teaching, we indulge in a little Xinjiang food, and then hop across the street to the Shenmei. I know I have written about this before, but the Shenmei is seriously one of my favorite Beijing experiences. The Shenmei is a place where you go to get your hair washed, cut, colored, etc. We are officially Shenmei regulars, and I feel like I know all of the staff (despite the fact I can't talk to them). Unfortunately, I have not yet been bold enough to do a China cut or color, but when we go we pay 20 yuan for what is supposed to be an hour massage and hair wash, but it usually ends up being about 2 hours (plus, we get our hair dryed by the super cool "laoshi", or teacher). We told them today that it was my last day and after a little mourning that I will "hui guo"-ing it, we decided to take some friendly pictures (and promptly walked next door together to get copies made). Ahhh, I will really miss my friends at the Shenmei.


I think that's all for now. I don't have much more to report (or that I'm willing to report at this time in a blog!); I'm spending all of my time with people, sleeping, or working. Maybe after I sit on a plane for 15 hours, I'll have a little time to reflect and write something worth reading.

I will return to America on July 2nd. Please be friends with me when I get back.

Ah, some time in Fuqing China

Per usual, my blogging record has been less than stellar. Once again, my apologies. I was chatting on the phone the other day with my mom (and by "phone" I mean Skype), and she started telling me how much everyone LOVES my brother and sister's blog because theirs are so interesting, and they always update it, and their lives are so exciting, yadda yadda, but since I don't update mine, none of her friends read it. No pressure. So this one is for all of you who aren't reading.

Life in the Zhongguo has been really busy lately, but really good. Of course, as I'm gearing up to leave Beijing, things start going really well--I'm starting to really enjoy Chinese and learn a little more (although my teacher might strongly disagree), work stuff is really starting to fall into place, and I've been busy with buddies. It's one of life's funny ironies. Anyway, busy but good.

Last Wednesday and Thursday, my boss Bruce and I took another trip to explore some business opportunities. This time, we went down south to a city called Fuqing (yes, really, foo-ching, laugh all you want) in the Fujian province. Fuqing is right off of the ocean, and right across the sea from Taiwan, so pretty far south. It was actually a really great trip. In all honesty, I was dreading the trip a little bit. I'm coming to the end of my time in Beijing, and just felt ready to stick around here and really soak up life. But, something nudged me a little bit, and I decided to make the time (and significant financial) commitment to take the trip to Fuqing. AND... I'm really glad I did. Out of all the business options that I've explored, I think this one holds the most potential for the goals we want to accomplish. So hopefully, I can whip up a quick business plan to bring home (and to prove I was doing a little bit of work while here).

In addition to being a really exciting business opportunity, the trip to Fuqing was just really interesting. We stepped off the plane in Fuzhou (the nearest large city) and were greeted by green grass, palm trees and ridiculously humid air. I felt like I was on a tropical vacation. Our contact, Jeremiah, led us across the parking lot, past all the beautiful, shiny black cars (that surely had air conditioning) to an old, beat-up, Gordy Wilson-style Ford van, complete with the rusty wheel wells and Chinese driver sleeping with legs on the dash. After a swift bang on the side of the van, the driver was quickly alert, and greeted us with the biggest smile I've ever seen. Seriously, this guy was just happy. So, we piled into the van, backed out of the spot, drove over a few sidewalks to avoid waiting in line (really, no need to wait when you can just hop over a sidewalk), and were soon on our way, bouncing down the road to Fuqing. Now, I've heard China driving horror stories, but have really yet to experience anything that I would consider "unbearable"... until now. If one thinks that Beijing traffic is bad, you have another thing coming. We're driving down this highway, two lanes with a grass median, and naturally one would assume that one lane is for traffic going one direction, while the other lane is used for traffic going the other direction. But, this is China, and as we've noticed, the rules are never quite "the rules". We are whizzing down this highway, much faster than anyone else, and cars and motorcyles and bicyles and oxen and goats and people are just wandering lazily down this road (the motorized vehicles drive in either lane, there isn't quite a rhyme or a reason). Keep in mind, this is a legitimate highway, like I-35 or something, with people and cars and animals going every direction. So, we're speeding and bumping along with no AC, dodging whatever is in our way, with the driver grinning the whole way. Needless to say, we're thanking the Big Guy we're still in one piece.

All in all, Fuqing was just a really interesting experience for me, because it presented a side of China I haven't seen yet. It was rural, but in a different way than the rural I saw in Taiyuan, or the China I've seen in other smaller cities. It had this bizarre combination of extreme wealth and poverty (massive, and ugly, 6-7 story houses built for one family, right next to a family living in a shack that is falling apart), of modernity and old ways (beautiful cars and buildings and every sign of progress, surrounded by animals walking in the streets, men leading their oxen on ropes and people carrying water on their back through the fields). It was a really great and intriguing experience.

So, now that I've rambled, I better get back to... everything else I've been missing out on the last few days. Hopefully more to come before I fly back to the Meiguo.

Beijing Musings

As I was walking home from the subway station this afternoon (after a frustrating day of teaching little, poorly-behaved Chinese children), I thought to myself: "How can I best utilize my free afternoon? Should I send e-mails (which I have recently neglected to do--my apologies)? Should I do laundry? Should I sleep? Should I eat?" But after some deep contemplation and soul searching along the roadside of Chengfu Lu, I decided, "You know what... I'm going to blog. Maybe people are interested in what their long lost friend is up to... maybe they aren't, but at least I tried."

So, here we go. Unfortunately, there are no significant occurrences or events in my life at this time, so you won't get to witness, via my internet journal, my vast array of personal breakthroughs and areas of growth. I know, I know, you are disappointed. Maybe next time.

So, my time in Beijing is starting to come to an end. As of today, I have 25 days until I depart to the US of A. I'm not going to lie... last week, I was really ready to go. I was ready to stop fighting every day with my water heater (luckily, I'm up to about 75% of my showers being warm...), ready to live in a clean apartment without a rotting bathroom door and uncontrollable mold, to wear clothes that were really clean (and dried!), ready to drive a car and not fear for my life, ready to ask questions in my own language, ready to see my friends and family, and pretty much just ready to be resident of one of the best nations in the world. But, of course as my luck would have it, this week I'm feeling really nostalgic and not ready to go. I'm really going to miss this place! After spending three months struggling with culture and language and food and directions... I'm starting to understand. I'm feeling more comfortable in my own skin. I know at least 3 Mandarin phrases that will get me help when I need it. I like my little (chaotic) neighborhood. I like my elevator attendant. I loooove street food. I'm addicted to 20 kuai ($3) manicures and 48 kuai ($6.95) hour and a half massages. I think it's really funny that Chinese men are always pulling up their shirts, and that Chinese women always wear ankle-length nylons with capris and shorts. In all honesty, this bizarre (and lets face it, sometimes really aggravating) culture has weaseled it's way into my heart! And I'm going to be sad to go.

This is probably what people refer to as "reverse-culture shock"... only I'm preempting what I will feel before I even go. I'm soaking in all of China I can before I return to Minnesota, and who knows how long it will be until I come back to China. For me (and I can't speak for everyone), there is something really... great (sorry, I can think of a smart word) about living overseas. It is full of "grrr" moments, angry fists raised in the air, ambiguity, confusion, and unending frustrations. BUT, there is also this sense of belonging that comes from un-belonging, a sense of comfort that comes from knowing that your discomfort is completely expected, even welcomed and shared by all. Maybe for me, there is also this sense of addiction (again, wrong word!) to learning about, existing in, and adapting the values of other people that I exist with from all around the world; not only what I've learned about Chinese culture and people, but what I've learned about life from my friends that are from various parts of the United States, from Australia, from England, from Israel, from Nigeria, from Korea, from everywhere. And although sometimes it feels like "East vs. West" creates chaos and a great deal of misunderstanding, there is also a ridiculous amount of similarities.

Ok, I'm done, again, being all novel-esque, but really, I am sad to go.

In other news, Carmen and I treated ourselves to a foot and back massage yesterday after our Chinese classes. I usually love massages, and am always asking people to "push harder!", but yesterday, I met my masseus match. As I sat in this recliner watching the women around get their backs cracked and their arms yanked behind their heads, I should have known what I was getting into. But I thought I could handle it, I thought I could be strong. It all started with a back massage, and that felt wonderful... but then he stopped being kind and decided to dig in. The guy literally put his whole weight behind rubbing my neck and shoulders, and I told him (in broken Chinese) "It's a little to hard", but it didn't work. I'm feeling the effects today. I went to put my hair back this morning, and my neck was tender to the touch! Who knew a massage could do such things. But, as they say... no pain, no gain. I think in the end, it was worth it.

I think I've done enough rambling. I'm going to make me some lunch, and enjoy my Saturday afternoon. I'm currently reading Jayber Crow by Wendell Berry (lent to me by a friend), and it is a really beautiful book--slow, but rich in meaning and beautiful descriptions, just my kind of read. So, I am going to enjoy. Hopefully I'll be a little more faithful about the writing, at least before I leave Zhongguo to return to Meiguo.

Zaijian.

Beijing Bicycle (and other thoughts on China)

Today, I had the privilege of having my very first Beijing Bicycle ride. As many of you know, the bike is one of the most common forms of transportation in Beijing, and probably in China as a whole. You are swarmed by bicycle riders the minute you step foot on the street, and I'm pretty sure bike riding is an art, attempted by only the brave. There is even an excellent film made called "Beijing Bicycle", depicting the story of a Beijing resident that really could be any average resident's story. If you have the opportunity, I suggest you check it out. Anyway, back to the bike. My co-worker Carmen is headed to Hong Kong for the week, so she said I could borrow her bicycle while she was gone (I really should have bought my own, but now it's too late for the investment). Regardless, I felt pretty ecstatic about this offer, and gladly took her up on it. This means INDEPENDENCE in transportation in Beijing; no crowded subway, no smelly bus, no ridiculously long walks. My own transportation. Yesssss.

So, this evening, I went for a leisurely ride. Since I'm still a newbie at city bike riding, I just rode across the street to Tsinghua University (which is now officially my favorite place in Beijing because of all the open spaces). Tsinghua is my biking paradise, because there are very few cars, wide streets, lots of other bikers, and many many trees (a rare sight for Beijing). Bike riding in Beijing is a scary thing for me; I'm used to my car and lots of room to maneuver. No such luxuries here. And, sorry to say, Carmen's bike isn't the most sturdy (sorry Carmen!), but I'm wobbling down the street, using about all the man power my little arms can muster just to stay on the road. I think it's a pretty funny sight for people to see a white blonde girl on a bike. So, I rode through Tsinghua and made my went to the center of campus where there is this beautiful lake and trees and gardens, and I had a sit in the sunshine and journaled some China thoughts. Other than the occasional blog, I haven't had much time to reflect on China, so I decided to write down a few thoughts and share them. I wrote this after reading a novel, so please forgive me if my language is a little cheesy romance novel-ish.

From the park bench where I sit, I can view all of my favorite things about China (minus the street-food!); I see a traditional Chinese structure sitting on the edge of the lake, with its ornate tile roof and up-turned corners. The building has faded from what was once a brilliant red to a dull brown, but the ornate paintings that line the top still speak strongly of the years this place has seen. Through the openness and columns of the structure, I see willow trees drooping over the lake, their stark green spring leaves reflecting on the water and swaying in the ever-present Beijing wind. And then there's the people. I think volumes could be written about the Chinese people, and still no justice would be done to the complexity that surrounds them. Right now, I'm watching the classic grandpa/grandson pair; the grandpa leads his grandson near the water, then they go chasing each other around the tree in the courtyard. I see the young couple, sitting together very sweetly and overlooking the water, always holding hands. I see the mom with her baby, naked baby butt in the air. And then from across the water, I see the inescapable reminders of poverty: the old man working hard, hauling tree branches across the park, the other old man in rags digging through to garbage to find plastic bottles to trade in for money. And these scenes to me paint a vivid picture of modern China--the inseparable space shared by progress and history, old and young generations, tradition rubbing against modernization, the wealthy and educated rubbing shoulders with those who can barely survive. I know that sounds really cliche, but that's China. A melting pot for stark contrasts, the struggle for change and progress in a system weighed down by tradition and control. How will China come out? I think the world is waiting to see!

And, as I wrote that, there was some guy taking pictures of me, and another guy drawing a picture of me. And again, that is China.

the average life of a girl in china.

I think I read on my friend Bjorn's blog lately some comment about not having much to say. I must admit that that's where I'm at right now... I haven't blogged for awhile because life has been pretty average. I guess one could argue that the life of a Westerner in China is never quite "average", which is very true. But after a little while, what once caught my eye as being funny, interesting, or even exciting has sadly turned...just average. So, I'll just update you on some "current events" in this waiguoren's life.

At the beginning of this past week, I took a trip to Shenyang with my boss to check out a "business opportunity" up there. Shenyang is a city that is northwest of Beijing, and also pretty big (8 million people)---it will host the Olympic soccer, which is exciting. Unfortunately, I didn't really get to see much of Shenyang because all we did was business. Bor-ing. I guess that's adulthood creeping up on me... travel with no fun included. Anyway, we DID get to kick off the day with a bang. Our office branch that is located in Shenyang has connections with this kindergarten, and we happened to be there for their "English Olympic Performance" (I don't even know if that's what it's called, but it was something like that). Being that I am a foreign person, I usually get special duties and responsibilities. On Monday, I happened to get the privilege of singing and dancing impromptu in front of 1000 students. Awesome. However, the kicker was right before we were going to sing; there were these little girls on the stage (who were going to sing with us) in these elaborate dance recital-ish outfits, and it was part of the routine that they ask us some questions before we all sang. The conversation went like this:
little chinese girl: (yelling at me) Hello! How are you today?
me: I am fine, thank you.
little chinese girl: (still yelling at me) Would you please accept this gift to you from our school (hands me a sticker).
me: Ok.
girl puts the sticker on my shirt
little chinese girl: (yelling a little less loudly) Will you please sign on my hand?
I sign the girls hand
little chinese girl: (turning around to face the crowd and thrusting her fist into the air) I have received the signature of the foreign visitor!

Maybe it was one of those "you had to be there" moments, but... oh China. I'll try to link a video of some other kids that were singing and dancing to Jingle Bells (yes, in May). It isn't very steady, but you can see just how cute they were! (its at the bottom)

This morning, my co-worker Carmen and I had our usual Saturday morning classes. Since her birthday is on Monday, we decided to treat ourselves this afternoon! We had Xinjiang for lunch (a province in the Northwest of China, with delicious food), and then went to treat ourselves to a hairwash at our favorite place, the Shenmei (down the street from teaching). I think every trip to the Shenmei is an adventure. For all of my Minnesota friends, I just want to let you know that we get an hour (usually hour and a half) head and shoulder massage for 15 kuai (a little over $2). It is ah-maz-ing. Anyway, today we went, and as usual, the person massaging me started asking me some questions (in Chinese). I smiled and shrugged and said "ting bu dong" (I don't understand), but did that deter him? Never. He kept asking me questions, all the time, and I stopped even telling him that I didn't understand. I think he just wanted to be friends but... I think you have to at least have some common language to do that. Also, I think he was fascinated by my hair. While the special "Shenmei hair expert" came over to dry my hair, this kid just stood there and would pick up strands of my hair and stroke it, and turn it over and look at it. It was a little bit cute. It was a wonderful and relaxing experience (except for all these questions I just didn't understand).

Pretty much my entire life is really eventful and non-eventful all rolled into one.

Also, I feel like I keep writing about my life... and while I know this is ever-so exciting to hear about, I want to know what's going on with you too! E-mails, letters, cards, packages, flowers, gifts, chocolate (ok, really just e-mails) from home are always a real encouragement and fun to read. So, keep up the good e-mailing.

Lastly, I do want to add one thing. Although my life may be anti-climatic for the time being, life is anything but for thousands of people in Southern China. The amount of people struck by the earthquakes in Sichuan is devastating, and it is heartbreaking to think of how many fathers, mothers, sisters, brothers, teachers, co-workers and friends were lost in this natural disaster of gigantic proportions. I know from first hand experience that sometimes events across the world don't phase us much, but I urge you to keep the families of China in your thoughts as they struggle through such a grief-stricken time. I guess I could be an advocate for many international injustices, but the people of Burma/Myanmar are also facing a tragedy of astronomical proportions, so keep them in your thoughts too.